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  • Writer's pictureGarrett Miller

Welcome To Your Magnificent Monday

Believe & Receive! Attract & Allow! Ever have those conversations with people who just grate on your nerves and you want to shout out, "Put a sock in it!" What about pictures of guys from the 70's in mega tight faded blue jeans which look like the guy stuffed a giant Hillshire Farms in with their twig-like legs? Apparently the new thing is to put your thing in a hole in your underwear to make your thing appear bigger. By doing such thing, said thing, allegedly, completely removes the need for at least 100 adjustments throughout the day. I'm a guy. On my best warm-weather day I'm average. In colder weather, I'm definitely an under achiever. I have also been in a locker room before. So I've seen lots of things. I've also seen lots of things in person. The majority of things I've seen would simply be lost in a separation of church and state. Today I have limited myself to 10 questions about this underserved growing market of thing relocation. * Who needs to adjust themselves 100 times a day? * What is happening when getting dressed which results in the requirement of adjustments to fix what wasn't correctly installed during the initial morning dressing? * Are men really suffering from from having things and other things being next to each other in their underwear? * How were men able to survive the last kajillion years wearing "old timey non thing separating" underwear? * Do grown men who look like this model really play Nintendo in their underwear? * Where, in public, are men comfortable putting their thing in a separate thing, which would require some performance art of placement, so they could then put pants on to return to the version of life considered normal? * Are there places men gather away from locker rooms where congregating in thing separating underwear is a thing? * Why haven't there been news posts blasting prior underwear incarnations by the media citing a Kardashian and their thoughts on things?

* Is there a money back guarantee if you wear thing separating underwear in cold weather? * Seriously, who thought of this? As I do laundry this morning and carefully fold my ancient briefs, I will be wondering if I should invest in a massive thing separating portfolio or if the time old tradition of package bundling will still serve my unadjusted needs. How are you spending your day today? Making any adjustments in your life? Post your meme's and share your story here!

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